It’s Probably Worse For Me Than It Is For You

Posted on February 24th, 2006 in This And That

I am hurting today.

I feel raw and miserable and distressed.

I don’t know how to fix it and I feel like I don’t have any control.

I can’t think of anything else.

I am angry, and I hate that.

It makes me wish we had never even started this, but I know I don’t really believe that because of what it would mean.

I just wish it didn’t have to be like this.

I don’t know if it will ever be better and that makes me sad.

And a little bit scared.

Published by Shasta

5 Responses to “It’s Probably Worse For Me Than It Is For You”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    you’re really on a roller coaster of emotions over the past week!

    did something happen with jack that brought on these deep, sad feelings?

    or is the reality of being without K just starting to sink in?

    or is it none of our business?

    get out of the house..take the kids to the park or the mall or just drive around or take a long walk…..

    you can make it through this, and things will get better!

    Reply To The Above Comment

  2. padme Says:

    I’m sorry to hear your not feeling too good. I hope you know I’m here if you need me at all. Even for a shoulder to lean on. I really hope things look up for you soon…

    Reply To The Above Comment

  3. Stiletto Girl Says:

    Anon, thank you so much for your concern :) It makes me glad that I blog.

    Basically being without K is making me sad. Compounded by the fact that Jack and I can’t seem to find any common ground on the issue, and also because I am on my period which makes me extra sensitive, LOL.

    Thanks again, I really appreciate your comment.

    Padme, thank you for your friendship and your support and encouragement. It really does mean a lot to me, and I will be sure to come find you when I need a shoulder :) You’re one in a million girl. *HUGS*

    Reply To The Above Comment

  4. Anonymous Says:

    I hope your relationship survives this. IMO you get emotionally attached easily and this would have,or will happen with someone else. K just happened to be the first to come along. Are you just in this for sex, or looking for something else? Best of luck to you and Jack!

    Reply To The Above Comment

  5. Stiletto Girl Says:

    Anon, I know that regardless my relationship with Jack will be ok. We are very commited to each other. I do tend to get attached, but I think it’s because I don’t sleep with anyone that I don’t feel some sort of connection with. I can make myself have sex with someone just for the sake of sex, I have to genuinely like them as a person.

    We started out just looking for sex, but now this has happened and perhaps I won’t be able to continue this arrangement because of my attachment, and I am ok with that.

    Thanks for the comment :)

    Reply To The Above Comment

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