Stiletto Diaries

I’m Not A Whore. I’m A Relationship Technician.

Archive for the ‘Simply Dreadful’ Category

Goth GirlOn Friday night Nia and I had planned to go out to this goth/industrial night, a weekly feature at a local bar. Some weeks ago I purchased some synthetic dreadlocks designed to wear with natural dreads, so I decided Friday would be an ideal time for a test run.

They were easy to put in and they looked pretty hot. I completed the ensemble with a short pleather skirt, knee high boots, a black tank top, a collar, and plenty of black eyeshadow.

I drove over to Nia’s place, and we caught a cab over to the bar. There wasn’t any cover charge, and it wasn’t super busy, but the music was good and the booze was cheap.

We drank a bit and danced a lot. I got a few great compliments on my hair, and we were groped by a very drunk guy (no surprise there). We had a lot of fun, although we didn’t stay out super late. It was pretty cold out so to avoid a long wait for a cab we left shortly before last call and went back to Nia’s place. I hung out there for at least another hour and a half before I decided I was safe to drive home (I’d only had a few drinks).

Yesterday I did a bit of shopping to put the finishing touches on my Christmas gifts. During my travels I happened into this odd little indie boutique where I happened across the most amazing bag I’ve ever seen. Totally hand made here in Canada, and not mass produced, it was on sale for $40.00 (regularly $120). It was designed and manufactured by an artist in Quebec. So very cool. I knew I would probably never see anything like it again, so I decided to treat myself. The man who rang me through was, I swear on my soul, LD’s doppelganger (or at least close relative). Very similar looks, same voice, same presence. He was fabulous, and I very much plan to go back to said store in the hopes of running into him again. Not to mention the fact that the store is incredible.

This week I have a waxing appointment with a new esthetician. I took the advice of one of my commenters and looked for someone who specializes in European techniques. I’m hopeful that she will do a better job than the last gal, since I haven’t much patience for trying out someone new every 5 weeks.

Honestly I wanted this post to be longer and more interesting but I’m feeling a it fatigued from lack of sleep, so I’ll cut it short. I should have some more exciting things to say later this week, not to mention all of the awesome questions I’m getting for Dear Shasta. Feel free to me with your questions for future segments (I can only keep posting them if my readers keep asking me stuff).

I hope everyone is having a good weekend. Only 9 more sleeps until Christmas!


Dreadlocked HNT


A more recent photo of my dreads. You can check out how they looked in the beginning by going here.

i iz blogginz / leef I alonzeIt’s been a while since I felt the need to write and yet had NOTHING TO SAY. Generally in that situation I just do exactly what I am doing right now. I start typing and hope that the subsequent rambling makes sense.

Ok that’s all I’ve got for today.

Kidding, LOL, sort of.

Jack and the kids and I are all good as can be. On the weekend we lounged, rented Transformers, and went shopping. When we are out shopping with the kids, we have this game that we play. When we get to the vehicle, both Jack and I grab a kid and race to see who can get said kid buckled into their car seats the fastest, and then he and I race to see which one of us can get into our seats and buckle in the fastest. Usually he and I end up having to call a truce because we both end up in the front seat, biting and shoving each other in order to prevent the other person from getting their seat belt done up, while at the same time trying to do up our own belts. You have to see it to believe it, and we’re laughing madly the entire time and the kids think this is just THE GREATEST GAME EVAH! They squeal and giggle and carry on, just like us. Yup, a van full of kids is what it is. No adults here.

We also spent a fair amount of time in bed cuddling, and making love. It was heavenly. I adore being close to Jack, especially when we are both naked. I could just lay there, pressed against, him all day. I can’t ever get enough. Sometimes we will talk softly, while I rub his back and give him a scalp massage. Or we will giggle and laugh and goof around. Most often we just stroke each other and doze, half-conscious and yet reluctant to leave dreamland and the comfort of our soft, white sheets.

This is why mornings are my favorite time of the day people.

Sometimes it amazes me how deeply in love we still are. This month marks the 6 year anniversary of our engagement. We’ve been together almost 7 years and yet, I feel like I love him more and more each year that passes. I’m saving a bottle of Ice Cuvee for our celebration, and we have arranged sitting so that we can go for dinner some place more ‘grown up’ than Denny’s or Boston Pizza.

When I look at him, I can’t help but think “How lucky am I? I get to be married to the most wonderful man I’ve ever met. We get to be together FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” Seriously. That’s exactly what goes through my head. I get so happy and excited about it I could pee my pants.

It’s like winning the lottery, becoming famous and adored world-wide, and winning the Nobel Prize, all rolled into one. Only, a million times better.

Hee Hee

In other news, I’ve been some what slacking on the healthy living front. My eating habits have been questionable, at best. Although, I have worked out a couple of times in the last few weeks. I need to make it a more regular occurrence. I’ve become friends with a personal trainer and a dietitian at the gym I go to and we are perhaps going to work out an arrangement where I provide babysitting services in exchange for workout/eating advice. Hooray!

Over the weekend I bought myself some new dread care stuff. I haven’t talked about my hair here in months, but I still totally adore my dreads. They are maturing nicely, and I’ve gotten quite a number of great compliments on them. These days I can wash them regularly (generally once every few days, just because having them wet all the time can cause them to smell like mildew) and I basically ignore them otherwise. That’s the best part of having dreads. I never have to do anything with them and they still look awesome. Most days I throw them up in a loose bun, or wear them down with a head band. The stuff I bought on the weekend is bar soap/shampoo that I found at a natural foods store. It’s fair trade, organic soap, made with hemp, coconut oil, palm oil, and other natural ingredients. I bought a bar of the lavender scented, and a bar of the tea tree scented soaps. I can’t wait to try them! They smell amazing, and I like that it’s natural, organic, and fair trade. Also I’ve become very fond of shampoo bars over liquid.

Hmmmmm, what other topics can I add to the hodge podge I’ve got going on here?

Still searching for a good esthetician out here. I went to one young woman so far. She was very sweet, charged a reasonable price, but didn’t do the sort of job I am accustomed to. There were hairs left behind, and she only went over the area once with wax, rather than twice like Selma used to. Also, she didn’t wax between the cheeks, which maybe sounds nasty, and I don’t have like a bush of ass hair, but it’s nice to be smooth all over. That way when someone has their mouth down there it doesn’t go from silky soft to suddenly slightly hairy. I think I’ll try somewhere else next time, which will be soon so I’d better get on that.

Nothing at all to report on the polyamory front. I’ve not had a date or even talked to anyone lately (since The SmartAss really). Jack barely has free time between work, me, and the kids so nothing going on there. We aren’t really thinking/talking about it much because there just isn’t anything to think/talk about. Life has a totally different focus for the time being. When that changes, I am sure you’ll know :)

Other than that…I’ve got nuthin. Basically just as happy as ever and generally enjoying life.

Tomorrow is Toy Lust Tuesday, so make sure to check back for a hot product review.

The clouds looked quite menacing, but we decided to brave the weather and go camping anyway. To make the rest of the story easier to tell, I will reveal the ‘identity’ of the mysterious man I asked to join me. Some of you will remember him as Q. If you have no idea who I am talking about, you can read about him in the following posts (listed chronologically from past to present):

How I met Q

A date we went on

Running into him at a bar

Running into him at another bar (it seems to be a trend with us)

Anyway, despite my initial disinterest in him, recently I’ve been thinking of him and attraction sort of grew over time. I was quite thrilled that he accepted my invitation to go camping.

He and I drove out together on Sunday afternoon. We had a really good time on the way out, I did a good part of the talking, but I learned a few new things about him. It’s rather strange because we have a sense of familiarity about each other, but I really don’t know him very well.

We arrived at the camping area, which is not an actual camp site, it’s a piece of land owned by V’s family that lies well outside of the city. It’s basically a large clearing within a larger cluster of trees. Bordered on all sides by farm land, it has no electricity or running water. I like it that way, because my idea of camping means roughing it.

It was too muddy to drive right into the clearing, so we parked on higher ground and walked down the muddy ‘road’ to where everyone else was gathered around the fire pit. I’ll tell you it was a precarious walk. It’s a slight hill, and I nearly slipped and fell half a dozen times. Q and I were going to be sleeping on a mattress in the back of my van, since I was in no mood to assemble our enormous tent for one night. I was not looking forward to stumbling up the hill in a drunken blur at the end of the night, LOL.

Did I mention it was raining?

It started about 15 minutes after we arrived and didn’t stop until well after we left the next day.

The men (K, V’s brother, Q, and a few other guys) gathered the wood for the fire. V, a friend of hers, and I prepared supper. I grilled some meat on the BBQ and they made campfire pizzas. Everyone ate, and drank, and we were all in pretty good spirits considering we were soaking wet.

We built a ‘ghetto’ out of tarps and umbrellas around the fire. Everyone settled in and had some beverages. All in all it was a good time. Cold and wet and muddy, but good none the less. We laughed a lot, I took some pictures, V bailed hardcore in the mud, and I almost fell into the fire pit. I enjoyed cuddling with Q by the fire, and K did rather well not acting weird about it. I did catch a few looks from him, that are best described as somewhat irritated. However, all in all I felt that he handled himself well.

I didn’t drink very much because I knew I was going to have to make my way up the hill to go to bed. Around midnight I decided I was done with the rain and the mud and excused myself to bed. Q joined me and we found our way back to the van. Stripping down in the rain was interesting. I didn’t want to crawl into bed with wet clothes on, so I just took them off and then climbed under the covers as fast as possible. I kept on my underwear and a tank top. Q jumped in beside me in his boxers and a shirt. We cuddled up for body heat and before long I could feel my toes again, LOL.

We talked for some time, and then there was kissing, and groping, and removal of clothing. The foreplay lasted an impressively long time. I enjoy a man who is not in a hurry to fuck. He touched me all over, commenting several times on how soft my skin is, and how good it felt against his. He was quite vocal (meaning he made plenty of noises that let me know he was enjoying himself) and I appreciate that a great deal during sex. I dislike it when a man is quiet, it makes me feel like he’s not into it.

He loved my dreads and when he wrapped a handful of them in his fist and pulled my head back to expose my neck, I nearly melted.

His job is physically demanding and phew! The biceps on the man are enough to make me weak in the knees. His back is toned and the muscles are tight under his skin. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm *Drool*

When I ran my hand up the inside of his thigh, brushing past his cock and up his stomach he was quivering with anticipation. I enjoyed teasing him before I finally allowed him his reward.

I still marvel at how relaxed he was, totally unrushed. He obviously enjoys the sensual and passionate experience of physical intimacy, rather than the main event.

Eventually neither of us could stand it any longer, he pulled me over on top of him and pushed me down onto his cock. It felt…amazing [and yes, we used a condom, there was no question about that].

Unlike some experiences I’ve had, we fell into a comfortable rhythm immediately. I was somewhat concerned that my van might roll forward into the car parked in front of us, LOL. I didn’t put on the parking brake, and I probably should have.

He loved it when I squeezed my muscles around his shaft. Even though I dislike being on top, I have been told I am quite incredible at it. I do this thing where I ’scoop’ my pelvis while I am rocking my hips at the same time, and it seems to rub most guys just the right way. I know it drives Jack wild, and Q was no different in that sense.

He took his turn thrusting from beneath me. That was pretty wild, because he did it in such away I thought I might actually cum from intercourse alone.

I liked how he pulled me to him and kissed me hard while we fucked.

He was getting close, I could tell because his breathing changed and so I increased my efforts and he came with several loud gasps/grunts/bellows. It was excellent.

After we had both recuperated he held me close and I fell asleep.

We woke up the next morning to snow caked on the windows of the van.


I was not looking forward to jumping outside for my regular morning pee.

We stayed in the nice warm van as long as possible. Eventually I heard someone bang on the hood, so I opened the side door and poked my head out. K informed me that people were up at the camp site (everyone else camped in tents and trailers in the clearing). I told him we’d be down as soon as we got dressed.

After forcing myself into cold and still damp clothing, we made our way down the now-treacherous hill. Cleaning up and packing of stuff ensued. It took us a number of hours in the snow and mud to get everything put away and carried up to the vehicles.

Then there was the matter of V’s cousin (not sure that they are related, I am guessing). He had driven his truck into the clearing at the beginning of the weekend, before the rain. Now there was a considerable bog between his vehicle and the top of the hill where the ground was firm.

Idea #1 - Hook the truck up to an old bronco that serves as the ‘farm truck’. Have people sit on the tailgate of the truck, and on the hood of the bronco to provide extra weight and traction. Take a run at the hill and see if the bronco can pull the truck through the muddy hole.

Guess where I was. That’s right, on the hood of the bronco, holding onto the windshield wiper for dear life. V’s friend (another girl) was up there with me, holding on to me for dear life. It was scary, but fun. V’s brother was driving the bronco, and he accelerated up the hill. It was not a smooth ride, and I was sure we were both going to fall off.

The rope snapped just as the truck was going through the muddiest part. The truck was stuck. The men jumped off the tailgate and pushed the truck backwards out of the mud.

Idea #2 - The boys sat on the tailgate again and V’s cousin took a good run at the bog. It didn’t look like he was going to make it. The tires were caked in several inches of mud. He kept going, the truck kept moving, ever slowly, up the hill. Us girls stood there cheering.

Success! Everyone got out and I headed back into the city to drop of Q and a load of camping stuff that I hauled out for V.

I bid Q a good bye and asked him if I could see him again. He said yes with a grin. I said that I hoped he had a good time, despite the weather. He assured me that he had and departed after a quick kiss.

I made it home, cold, wet, muddy, and stinking like campfire. Jack just looked at me and laughed.

Showering felt SOOOO good. I washed my dreads well with some new Knotty Boy Dread Shampoo that I picked up. Dreads easily pick up smells (like normal hair). Unlike normal hair it’s harder to get the smell out. Most people suggest you try to protect your dreads when you are in an odorous environment. Wear a toque or other hat. The shampoo I got is awesome. It smells like tea tree oil and peppermint. I was relieved that it got the camping smell out of them completely.

Despite the icky weather, the weekend was fun. I am glad I invited Q out. I hope he really did enjoy himself as much as I did.

Take It Off!This weekend is my TATTOO!!! I am so excited I can hardly stand it. Afterwards V and some friends are going out for a birthday bash, I’ve been invited along by the birthday girl. They are headed to a club in the city, and I am thinking if my neck isn’t too sore I will join them. If I am too uncomfortable I might just see if some friends want to do coffee or drinks in a quiet pub.

I’ll keep you posted! I hope all of my wonderful readers and friends had a great weekend. I’ve got some really cool reviews coming up so stay tuned!

Mmmmmmmm Coffee, Shasta Is PleasedI have been searching for something to write about here recently. The regularity of posting has dipped, and I don’t think I’ve written anything of substance in a little while. Bleh. Blog Block I suppose. There have been no sexy stories to recount, no complicated feelings to deal with, no drama to speak of. Life seems to have become a high-speed chase towards the move with little room for anything else. I could blog about the move, but even that is pretty uninteresting.

Inspiration eludes me.

I have reviews and articles in the works, but the main theme of this blog is supposed to be MY life, and the personal goings-on, inner thoughts, and other juicy goodness.

V and I have been spending copious amounts of time together. I know that once we actually move, it’s going to be a considerable amount of time before I see her again. Seeing as she is basically my other spouse, it’s important to both of us to see each other as much as we possibly can before that time. She has been constantly supportive, despite her own sadness over us moving away. She is always there for me, at a moments notice. She keeps me company while Jack is away, often spending the night so that I don’t have to sleep in our great big bed by myself. We are as close as two people can get, minus the sexual relationship. We have the sort of friendship that often makes people envious, and I am extremely grateful to have her, and I tell her that regularly.

I’ve been enjoying the influx of comments recently. My blog has never attracted loads of comments, unless an argument breaks out on the comment board. I am generally quite content, because I blog for myself, not to get comments. I would rather get a small number of thoughtful and genuine comments then a whole load of boring ‘cookie cutter’ ones. I am also very bad at commenting on other blogs, even when I really enjoy the writing. I prefer to think that most people are like me, taking pleasure in reading the content but not always having anything to share with the writer.

This weekend Jack and I are looking forward to some kid-free time. I am thinking we will go see a movie (I actually can’t remember the last time he and I went to a movie together) and generally take it easy. I’d like to do lunch with some friends, and I’ve been dropping hints about going to Globefish at some point, maybe for supper on Saturday evening. I’ve heard great things, so I am eager to try it.

I also need to go shopping for some new jeans at Old Navy, and I want to get some tea tree oil shampoo for my dreads. I haven’t been giving them much attention lately, which means that tonight or tomorrow I am going to have to sit down and devote a good four hours to back-combing, rolling, and waxing them. I have only washed them once since I got them, which probably seems really icky, but when it comes to new dreads it’s best not to wash them very often, unless you can sit out in the sun to let them dry, which helps tighten them up. Also T advised me to mist them with a mixture of sea salt and water, which aids with the locking process. If I lived near an ocean I could just go dip them in it.

Well I am grasping for things to say, which is generally a signal that it’s time to end this post. I do promise more interesting fare in the near future. Bear with me during this transition.

Happy Hump Day!


Sin On Wheels

Lick Lick!I miss my blog!


I looked at my sidebar and I have only made 9 posts this month, and April is nearly over.

It isn’t for lack of topics to write about. I have reviews piling up, and I want to tell you of the trip Jack and I made to Toronto. I even have photos!

Tomorrow I am going with V for our waxing. As you can see from my Cone Review I am well overdue.

Today I washed my dreads for the first time. That probably sounds disgusting, considering that I’ve had them for two weeks. However, most people in the know recommend waiting 1 - 2 weeks (or even longer if you can stand it) before getting new dreadlocks wet. This is because dreads can easily become untangled in the beginning, which is a bad thing. My dreads were fine, they look the same as they did before I got them wet. This evening I am going over to V’s to watch a movie and she is going to assist me in back-combing my roots and waxing my dreads again. Wax is important for dreads to keep them from becoming brittle, and also in retaining their shape and encouraging all of the hairs to tangle together. I wax mine about once a week, and I spend about four hours doing each and every one of them.

Next weekend is going to kick ass! Friday evening Jack and I are going out drinking with V and I intend to show off my awesome dreads and drink a LOT of tequila. We are trying to get in as many “One Last Hurrah” events as we can manage. Time just seems to be moving faster and faster, which is both exciting and sad.

Poly feels like a distant memory at the moment. We haven’t had any inclination to talk about it, nor any real need to address any of the residuals. Once we move there will be more energy for such things. At this point I have enough ‘feelings’ to deal with, related to moving across the country, leaving friends and family and everything I have ever known. I doubt I could make any headway with my insecurity issues at any rate. If I have to deal with more emotional upset…well I’d just rather avoid it for the moment, put it that way.

I am doing my best not to get really stressed out over the move. Jack and I are still debating about where to live. There are lots of areas in and around Toronto to chose from. We are also in the process of selling our house, which is a headache. Everything has to happen so quickly and getting all of the ’steps’ organized into some sort of smoothish chronological queue is rattling my usual rhythm of life.

Enough bitching! LOL

I hope you can excuse me, I just haven’t had a lot of opportunity to vent. I don’t like talking about it with family or friends because it makes them sad, which makes me sad. At least here I can just get it all out and then I feel better. Also I am menstruating, so my emotions are a little out of whack.

I am hoping to catch up on blogging this week. I have reviews to post and stories from our trip.


I miss this blog, although the less-that-enthusiastic reaction to my last HNT isn’t all that inspiring. I am not one to beg for comments, but I have to admit that I do care about them, and it makes me sad that so few people bother.

Anyway, I have been extremely busy with house/moving related stuff. It’s a lot of work relocating across the country. I haven’t had much time or inclination for writing, and it’s more practical to catch up on the housework when I have 5 minutes of free time. Not to mention taking care of new dreads is a LOAD of frickin work. Eventually they do become low-maintenance (or so I am told) but in the beginning, it’s constant vigilance with the waxing and the rolling and the backcombing.

I do have cool stuff to write about, and pics to post from a recent trip to Toronto. I am so lax with uploading though, LOL, it takes me days (sometimes weeks) to get pictures from my camera onto my computer. You would think I might find time, seeing as it’s a weekend, but nope. Weekends are extra crazy because Jack is at home during the days and we can tackle all of the tasks that take more than one person to get done. Sorting through mountains of paper and cleaning the garage and such. It would take me an entire week to do stuff like that by myself (having two rugrats underfoot doesn’t make it easy).

Anyway, I am off, perhaps to bed. I could use a few hours of extra sleep, since I have a really big day tomorrow. Jack is falling asleep on the couch so I should take him to bed as well. Have a good night all and see you in the next couple of days I hope!


Last-Minute HNT

I hope all of my readers had an excellent weekend, and a great Easter! I have been seriously lacking in the time department, hence lack of blogging.

I got my dreadlocks done over the weekend! I am so very pleased with them. My friends think they look awesome on me :) Here is some photographic evidence:

We took one last picture of my long hair pre-knots:


Right after we finished we took this photo:


I love the look of them when I put them up in a pony-tail as well:


What do you think? Once they become tighter (about 4 - 6 months) I think I will have some synthetic dreads of bright colors added into the mix, just to make them extra sexy.

If anyone wants more information about dreadlocks, I recommend checking out GUDU for accurate advice, great product suggestions, and instructions on starting and maintaining dreadlocks.

My apologies for such a short update. I am having V over for dinner this evening, so I have much to get done. However, more bloggy goodness coming your way in the next few days, so stay tuned!