I’ve been reconnecting with all kinds of aspects of my old self, including a foray back into the world of kink, most specifically for the moment, FetLife.
I’m not ready to step back into the local community just yet, but after reading through pages of old messages, I find myself missing how active and social I used to be. Years ago my inbox was full of invites and messages, everything from exclusive private parties, to backyard BBQ’s, and every kind of workshop under the sun. It’s strange to me now, because I don’t really remember all of this crazy stuff I used to do. It’s like reading about someone else’s life, which is troubling, but also so interesting, because I am so different now.
Don’t get me wrong, I am still so busy that I don’t often have time to catch my breath. I just run in different circles now I suppose. I still have an active social life, with many friends and acquaintances. I often have plans, and rarely any down time. I like it that way, as history has proven. I do miss the kink community back out east. I miss all of those people I used to see, talk to, play with. The parties, the munches, the camaraderie. Sometimes I miss Ontario so badly it hurts.
I didn’t expect to be remembered by anyone out east, but apparently I am. I am missed.
I can’t relive that time, but maybe I can rediscover that person, or some new version of her.