At the Halloween party I had the unique experience of being topped by both Deja and V. At first it was a little…strange, having V there, but once she got down to business with a riding crop I stopped giggling. It was a really good, although intense scene. My head went to a strange space and I felt emotional, and I sort of wanted to cry. Not from the pain, it was deeper than that. I was surprised and not entirely sure how to handle it. Fortunately V and Deja were there to coddle and love me and it passed as quickly as it had arrived.

My ass was sore for days after, as you can imagine from these photos, which were taken three days after the party.

Playing with Deja was a lot of fun, and I look forward to scening with her again, perhaps this weekend at the next play party I am going to.

On Saturday Jack and Nia and I went to Fet Fair in Guelph, which is like a craft/trade show for all things kink. I like it because it supports the local community, and the people who hand make all manner of fabulous toys.

It was a really great event! I got to introduce Jack to a number of my friends in the community, and he bought me a couple of new toys.

The bondage belt was of particular interest to Jack, especially as the man who made it buckled it under my breasts and demonstrated how my hands could be fastened at my sides, leaving the o-ring free for leading me about, or tying me to things, etc. Jack was sold on it! The wonderful salesman also threw in a wooden massager (pictured above, top right) which is lovely for sensation play.

Then there was the quirt, which is an easy-to-use alternative to other styles of whip. It may look small, but that thing packs a LOT of sting.

We were entranced by a demo of this portable suspension rig, and I’m rather hopeful that I might entice Jack to purchase one for me eventually (maybe for our anniversary *cough cough*).  I’d be happy with the cross at the very least, but if we had the suspension frame, we could use it for our sex swing as well.

On our way out of the fair, I stopped to enter the raffle draw they were having, which offered several really great prize packages.  Imagine my thrill and surprise when they called me some time later to tell me that I’d won second prize!

In the picture full of assorted implements you can see most of my winnings.  Here are individual photos of some of my favorites.  Although I forgot to get a shot of the whippy rattan cane that was in there and which has proven quite a lovely toy.

That evening V and Nia accompanied me to a play party, at which we had a fabulous time.  Deja was unable to attend but I did run into another Domme friend of mine who beckoned me to play.  The results of which can be clearly seen below (ass photos courtesy of V).

Notice the older bruises on the outsides of the thighs and hips?  Those were leftovers from the Halloween party, still looking rather nasty even a week later.

All of us had a marvelous time, and I’m looking forward to yet another play party this Saturday.  Unfortunately I don’t think it’s going to work out that V can attend, since Jack will be out of town on business, but Deja is going so I won’t be totally on my own (not that I would mind at this point).  It’s been wonderful getting out more in the community.  I seem to make new friends every time I go to an event.

I finally feel as though I’ve caught up on all the recent happenings, despite the lack of explicit detail (not my doing, those are just the rules).  I should have some more gratuitous ass shots to show off after this weekend, but in the mean time, here’s some boobies.  Happy Monday!

Since we were going to be staying the night in the city we packed up a suitcase of clothes, toys, and whatever other paraphernalia we thought we’d need that night and the next day.  We grabbed coffee and breakfast at Tim’s on our way out of town, since Padme and I both require copious amounts of caffeine for survival.

We made great time getting into the city, and the first order of business was to find parking at Eaton’s Center, and then go shopping in the mall.  If you’ve never been to this particular mall, basically the attraction is that it’s really big, with lots and lots of great stores.  My favorite part of the mall is the display of 50 Canadian geese, suspended from the atrium ceiling.

Not my best photography (by far!) but these should give you an idea of what I’m talking about:

At the mall we went into Indigo, where Padme and I browsed the sexuality section, and she picked up a book of memoirs written by a submissive.  I imagine it would be a great read.  If I wasn’t already up to my neck in books that need to be read, I may have been tempted to pick up one of the books on tantric sex, since I’ve been wanting to learn more about that much talked-about style of intimacy.

We also made a stop at one of our all time favorite stores, Lush.  We browsed all of the wonderful smelling products they offer, torn between what to buy just then.  I ended up treating myself to a Big Blue, a Geo Phyzz, and then decided to try something new with one of their bubble bars, Bathos.  I’ll be sure to let you know how I end up liking it

Padme and I are both chocolate junkies, so we couldn’t resist making a little purchase at Godiva.  Since the summer specials aren’t available all year long, I splurged on a box of six truffles from their new collection.  I had a few later that evening, and let me tell you, SOOOOOOO delicious.

Since we’d seen pretty much all we wanted to see at the center, we made our way out to the truck, and then up the street to NorthBound Leather.  Now, I’ve been reading about this place and drooling over their website for YEARS, and finally I was actually going there to check it out.  Padme and I were both beside ourselves with excitement.

Really it was everything I expected it to be, and more.  That earthy leather smell never fails to give me tingles, and the outfits…totally exquisite.  It took every ounce of will power I had to look through everything and not spend every dime I had.  I drooled over this dress, but I didn’t even try it on for fear I wouldn’t have been able to leave there without it.  There were boots and collars and all manner of fetish gear and toys.  If I ever win the lottery, I think I’ll go back there and just purchase one of everything, LOL, it’s that amazing!  I’m thinking I’ll have to take Varick there and talk him into buying a pair of leather pants.  Mmmmmm…

We managed to drag ourselves out of there, however reluctantly, without crippling our bank accounts.  There were a couple of other adult/fet wear shops nearby, so we decided to take a look around before we headed to Queen St for lunch.  I found a long, black PVC skirt, with slits up both sides, which I decided to pick up for future nights at Goodhandy’s.  It looks pretty hot on me, I must say   Perhaps I’ll get around to taking some photos for posting here sometime soon.

Padme picked up some more stockings (you would not believe how many different nylons and stockings that girl has, seriously) although she was still on the hunt for a new skirt or something similar to wear out that evening.

We left Yonge St and made our way over to the ‘shopping district’ of Queen St. W.  On our way we cruised past Much Music, which was setting up for the MMVA’s.  The street was an absolute zoo, and I was relieved that our destination was quite a bit west of there.  We found parking near to Banu, which is where we planned to have lunch.

It’s a really sleek little place.  Trendy couch-type chairs to relax on, and tables tiled with small turquoise squares.

Padme and I both ordered vodka, 2 oz each, on the rocks.  She had the Stolichnaya Elit (Russian) and I had Zubrowka Bison Grass vodka (Polish).  We were also brought a bowl of seasoned pistachios, which helped tide us over until our food arrived.

I’ve never been keen on drinking spirits straight up, so that was an experience in itself.  Had it not been such fine vodka I doubt I could have managed it without gagging, LOL.  At any rate, it was satisfying to cross yet another item off the bucket list:

263. Do Vodka shots at Banu

And that wasn’t all!  For lunch Padme ordered Joujeh (grilled chicken wings in a saffron citrus marinade) and I ordered Zaban (braised cow tongue in a tomato saffron sauce) followed by Dom balan (‘Urban Oysters’, lamb testicles marinated in vodka) for us to share.  Scroll over the photos to see what they are in case you’re not sure.

The beef tongue sandwich was really tasty.  The tongue was done perfectly, juicy and tender, and it went so well with the pickle chutney on the side.  Padme even tried a nibble and agreed that it was delicious.  Her chicken wings were fantastic, and I think should I ever go back to Banu, that’s exactly what I would order.  She let me try one and it was seasoned so perfectly and grilled just right.  Yum!

When the lamb testicles arrived, I was excited to try them.  They were surprisingly soft, easily cut with the side of a fork, with a very mild flavour.  I suppose you could compare it to liver, except not disgusting.

47. Eat something really bizarre (like animal testicles)

I think I’d even go so far as ordering these again, particularly if I was in the company of someone else who wanted to try them, but who didn’t want to commit to have to eating them all.  Padme tried a bite, but wasn’t exactly enamoured with them.

We debated ordering a hooka while we were there, but decided against it since we still had shopping to get done and we wanted to leave ourselves lots of time to get ready for Goodhandy’s later that evening.  The chef had never cooked the cow tongue before, and I praised him highly on it, which apparently paid off because he’d omitted it from the bill (or perhaps it had been an accident).

Our bellies full, we strolled up Queen St. and visited a few shops.  Padme found a VERY sexy, short PVC skirt at MissBehav’N.  I was so glad she found something because I know she’d been itching for a new skirt.  It looked fabulous on her, and she’d brought a little white top that ties in the front, to go with it.

We also stopped at Come As You Are, and browsed their impressive collection of toys and books.  Honestly I could have come home with dozens of books, I saw so many that I wanted, but I managed to restrain myself, somehow.

358. Spend a day shopping on Queen Street W in Toronto

Dufflet Pastry was our last stop of the day.  I wanted to take home a treat for Jack, to thank him for watching the kids for the weekend so that I could go out.  I picked up a baby truffle for me, and a blueberry buttermilk euro tart for him.

267. Take home a pastry from Dufflet

Padme picked out a coconut cream tart, and then off we went.  Our hotel was nice and close to the club, and we checked in with plenty of time to get ready, which was good, since it had been a hot day and we both felt like having a shower before going out.

We had some coffee, and then each of us had a shower.  I debated back and forth about what to wear, and we got into the vodka and gin we brought with us.  We were really excited about going out for the night and partying.  I was well on my way to drunk by the time we left the hotel.  I was wearing a very short, very see-through, bright pink and black tutu, and a black tank top.  I was carrying a riding crop, and giggling maniacally.  Padme said I fairly sprinted across the lobby, laughing my fool head off the entire way, and drawing far too much attention to myself in the process.  Ah well.

Goodhandy’s was still fairly quiet when we arrived, which I’d planned on, since I wanted us to have time to chat with Todd before he got terribly busy.  I introduced Padme to him and we had a chance to sit down for a chat together.  She showed him her new tattoo, which he seemed to like.  He also treated us to a round of drinks, which was so very sweet of him.  He asked if the rest of my ‘entourage’ would be making an appearance that evening, and I told him I wasn’t sure.  Nia was out of town for the weekend, so I didn’t know if Flavia and the rest of the bunch would show up.

When the club started to fill up, Todd had to excuse himself to keep an eye on everything.  I had noticed one of the spanking benches was up on the stage, but behind a curtain which they close to provide an area for women and trans people to get away from the drooling mass of males.  I asked Todd if it would be ok to drag the bench out to the front of the stage later, which he said would be fine.

Padme and I danced some, grinding against each other and putting on a bit of a show.  I sat down and she gave me a sexy lap dance, which was very hot, and it seemed like the guys were enjoying what we were doing.

421. Receive a lap dance

At some point Padme started talking to this attractive gentleman.  He bought us a round of drinks and the three of us ended up dirty dancing together.  It was great fun having a girl-guy-girl sandwich.  Padme and I made out some, but I was right in the middle of my period of course, which was kind of a downer.  Still, I wanted her to have a great night and get lucky   She asked me if I thought she should hook up with the guy.  He seemed very nice and he was totally good looking, so I encouraged her to do so.

She and he and I all went upstairs after we’d had enough dancing.  We staked our claim in one of the larger booths upstairs, although it didn’t have a curtain.  No matter, I was happy to sit by the doorway, riding crop in hand, to keep back the masses, and boy did I have my work cut out for me.

Padme and the guy started getting into it with each other.  Clothes started to come off and almost instantly there was a crowd gathered at the door.  I asked a few of them to step back, flicking my crop and then using it as something of a barricade.  One of them, a much older man, who was masturbating, put his hand on my leg and I shot him an unimpressed look.  You’re not supposed to touch without an invitation at Goodhandy’s, and he’s lucky I didn’t call over security to have him removed.  He pulled his hand away and then asked if he could touch me.

“Only if you want a serious ass kicking” I said, glaring.  He took a step back, and I was glad the the rest of the group heard me because none of them made a move on me after that.

Padme and her friend were really enjoying themselves.  They were fucking and groaning and kissing and licking each other.  It was quite a sight.  I was very pleased that she was having such a great time.

I noticed a somewhat familiar face in the crowd that was gathered at the door.  I recognised her as a cute cross-dresser whom I’d spoken to there once before.  Smiling, I invited her to sit down beside me on the bench while the others looked on enviously.  She thanked me for letting her sit down and we made some jokes about me guarding the entrance.  In fact the running joke between Padme and I for most of the evening was that I got to be the gatekeeper, and would only grant access to those whom I favoured.

One of the men watching was masturbating very close to one of my feet, because I had my legs crossed which put my foot almost directly under his exposed junk.  I remarked to my new friend (the cross-dresser, who probably needs a name, so I’ll call her Nikki) that if the guy came on my shoe I was going to crop him, hard, right on the cock.  He must have heard me because he seemed a little flustered and not sure what to do.  Nikki giggled and told me I should tap him on the cock with it anyway, and we both laughed.  She’s a bad one, she kept telling me to do it and I kept saying “No way!  You’re terrible!!!” and then we’d giggle some more.

Padme and her friend eventually got finished, after the whole club heard her screaming I am sure.  She’s a LOUD cummer, LOL.  While she went to get cleaned up, Nikki and I went downstairs and I pulled the spanking bench out from behind the curtain.  Nikki stripped down to her adorable bra and panties and up on the bench she went.

Having never played with her before I made sure to warm her up good.  I also paused to ask her how she was doing and if she wanted it harder/lighter, and that sort of thing.  She really seemed to be enjoying herself, and it wasn’t long before Padme returned and joined me in the exquisite torture of our willing victim.

There was also some play which involved Padme bent over, side by side with Nikki, and I was spanking them both simultaneously.  That was pretty neat really, LOL, and they seemed to enjoy it.  My concept of time was a little off, so I’m not sure how long we played like that, but we had drawn a bit of a crowd.  Eventually Nikki was finished her turn, and after she got off I jokingly swatted the bench with my crop and shouted “Who is next?”

Well this little old Asian guy standing near the stage stripped so fast I barely had time to realise what was happening.  Up on the bench he jumped in all his half-naked glory, with his man bits exposed for the whole room to see.  I just chuckled and started in on him.  I had my crop and also a small leather flogger, plus I used my hands.  Padme was complaining that she wanted a turn but I made her wait for it.  The guy seemed to really be enjoying himself, although it was a little too tempting to really go to town on his dangly parts with my crop, HA HA.

423. Spank a total stranger

When I grew bored of beating on his ass, I dismissed him, and he slinked away to get dressed again.  Padme was next on the bench, and I didn’t even bother with a warm up, I just laid into her with the crop and the flogger.  While I was doing this, a kind of odd guy came up, and he stood near her back end where I was working and looked generally confused.  He seemed to be trying to edge in as close as he could without getting the the way of my crop.  I was standing to one side of Padme’s ass, up on the stage, and he was standing on the floor directly across from me, on the other side of her.

Then, he reached out and put his hand on her leg, and I reacted in a split second, smacking him across the face with my crop.  Like literally, right on the cheek.  Not too hard, but certainly he made an impression.

“Do NOT touch without asking” I growled.  He stepped back, clearly startled.  I just glared at him, I wanted it to be completely clear to him and anyone else who was watching that I would not tolerate that sort of behaviour.  There are signs all over the club which clearly state that touching is not allowed unless there is a clear invitation, and in this case, there certainly was not.

He backed away, but returned later to pester us some more.  I shooed him away after he asked Padme to suck his dick.  Seriously buddy, get a clue!

I was getting played out from all the beatings I’d been giving, and finally decided to take a break.  I left Nikki and Padme while I headed outside for some air.  Who should I run into out there?  The clueless guy, of course!

“You know what the trouble with this club is” he said, clearly annoyed “the women don’t participate!”

I just chuckled.

“Sure they do.  Just not with YOU” I replied with a smirk.

He just shook his head and wandered off, dejected.  You know he was good looking too, so it’s a shame he was such a moron.  I mean what does he expect?  To go to a club and have women falling all over him and just fucking anything that moves?  Does that really happen anywhere in real life besides carefully organised private parties??  Somehow I doubt it.  99% of the women I know are a little more discriminating than that.

The night was winding down when I went back inside.  We gathered our things, said our goodbyes, and then Padme and I staggered back to our hotel, totally exhausted.  We barely made it up to our room before we collapsed.

However, we were STARVING, so I began searching online for pizza joints that still delivered at 3:30am.  Finally I found one, ordered a large chicken and cheese, and then promptly passed out.  Padme was already mostly asleep in bed, but she nudged me awake some time later, saying she thought the pizza was there.  I staggered to the door and took the pizza, paid, and then brought it into the room.

“Pizza is here” I said, then set it down on the chair.  Padme didn’t stir and I thought to myself “I’ll just lay down for a minute and then eat something”.  A minute tuned into four hours, and before I knew it, we were rolling out of bed to get the next day started.

Wild Weekend Posts:

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

Day 5

My weekend was both fabulous and tragic all at the same time.  Friday night Jack and I filled up our enormous bathtub, lit some candles, cracked open a bottle of 2006 Jackson Triggs Reisling, and turned on the jets for a nice long bath together.  We had a really good conversation while we soaked in the hot water and got thoroughly relaxed.  You know, the more people I date, the more I am grateful that I’m already with the most wonderful man ever.  We have a really beautiful life together and I am so, so very thankful for that.  After we had thoroughly lobsterized and prunified ourselves in the tub we crawled into bed together to cuddle. 

I slept so soundly that night, and woke up the next morning looking forward to going out for breakfast as a family.  Before we left I poked my head into my hobby room to make sure our fluffly little hamster had water and food, only to lift up her igloo and find her laying there perfectly still, and very much dead.  My heart dropped as I scooped her up and cradled her already stiff body in my hand.  I didn’t want to tell the kids right away, and I was a crying mess myself, so I placed her back under her igloo where they wouldn’t see her and went to tell Jack what had happened.  We didn’t go out for breakfast because I was far too upset.  She was my hamster more than anything, and it was so sudden, with no warnings.

The kids had a play date that afternoon so we decided to wait and tell them later on, so as not to ruin their day.  I took them to the park and they had a lot of fun with their friends.  I did my best not to think of how sad I was and how hard they were going to take the news.  I distracted myself with mom chat and taking pictures of the kids playing.

Needless to say they were upset, and we all had a long cry over the loss.  I found a small box leftover from packets of tea and put some tissue in it and then the hamster.  We explained to the kids that people live much, much longer than our pets and that it’s ok to be sad and to miss the hamster, but that she really enjoyed being our pet.

We took them out for supper, and picked up Nia as well, hoping that she could help us take their minds off what had happened.  It was nice to be out, and I’m so glad the my kids love sushi because it’s one of our favorite things to eat.  Naturally we don’t let them eat anything raw quite yet, but they enjoy the maki rolls with the artificial crab meat and avocados and so forth.  Jack encouraged Nia and I to go to Goodhandy’s for the night.  Get out and drown our sorrows and all of that.

After putting the kids to bed she and I got ready and off we went.  Before hitting the club we stopped at Flavia’s house and picked up her and her girlfriend and two male friends of theirs.  We got to Goodhandy’s, which was actually fairly busy.  We had drinks and watched people dance naked.  There were two really attractive transsexual girls having some fun on this platform beside the dance floor, which was hot to watch.

I wasn’t in much of a partying mood, but I had fun none the less.  That really beautiful trans women I’ve mentioned in a past post was there.  She came over and talked to me for a while and gave me a wonderful neck massage.  There was also some dirty danging and kissing.  She complimented me highly on my skills with my lips and tongue, which was very flattering.  She and I ended up hanging out quite a bit throughout the evening which I enjoyed a great deal.

One of the males in our group also wanted to get his first spanking.  I somehow got voted most ‘Domly’ in our group, and thus received the honour of welting his adorable little ass on the spanking bench, on stage no less!  He did, very, very well for his first time, and I’m sure he had a bruise or two the next day, Tee Hee.

It was fun being on the giving end, and I certainly understand the appeal of being a Domme.  While I certainly prefer being submissive, I still identify as a switch because I do enjoy giving out a good beating now and then.

Sometime shortly after, that hot trans gal was bent over and at least three or four of us were collectively spanking her.  Yum!  You know her and I got to talk quite a lot outside while having a cigarette at the end of the night and I’m always inspired by people who have undergone such amazing and difficult transitions in their lives.  I am really glad for the opportunity, however small, to get to know her a little better.

Nia and I headed home in the wee, wee hours of the morning.  It was a long drive, and I think I crawled into bed only minutes before 5am.

Sunday morning I woke up and came downstairs to Jack bringing home stuff to make breakfast.  I kind of spoiled their hopes of bringing it to me in bed, but it was delicious anyway

Then he coaxed the kids downstairs and they resurfaced minutes later yelling “Happy Mother’s Day” and presenting me with gifts.  I got a new griddle/grill that fits over the burners of our gas stove, and a margarita maker for the summer.  I can’t wait to test that thing out!  Strawberry margarita’s are sooooooooo yummy.

We decided to take the kids to see Horton Hears A Who, and then go for a drive and then out for supper.  The movie was so very cute, and the kids just loved it.  They fell asleep during our drive and so Jack and I got to have a great talk with each other and really enjoyed the time together.

Had Chinese food for supper, which was of course very good, not to mention filling.  I was happy that I didn’t have to cook at all on Mother’s Day, and as I tucked them in, I thanked my little rugrats for giving me such a wonderful time.

I hope you’ll forgive me, but I’m feeling wordy so this post is going to be pretty long, LOL.

Tomorrow night there is a kink munch near here which I plan to attend.  Last month there was a certain young Dom in attendance who is very new to the lifestyle and has been dabbling some in the realm of BDSM.  He caught my eye immediately, since he was quite attractive, and clearly someone I’d be interested in getting to know.  He was talking to a Domme friend of mine when I introduced myself on the way out the door, so I was sure to pull her aside to ask her to put in a good work for me if he seemed like a good guy.

A couple of days ago while I was chatting with her on MSN she mentioned said young Dom and that she intends to mentor him in the lifestyle and the practices of BDSM.  She also happened to inquire if I knew of any willing subs who would allow him to practice on them.  I couldn’t put up my hand fast enough!  She only laughed and said that she was glad since she knew I had liked him and she was hoping I would volunteer so she wouldn’t have to ask me out and out.

He will be playing with me in her dungeon, under her supervision.  Mmmmmmm two very attractive and confident Dominants for the price of one.  How much better can it get?  We’re going to sit down together, the three of us, and hash out the details and arrange times and dates at the munch tomorrow night.  Needless to say I can hardly wait to get started.  I’m getting tingles just thinking about it.  Certainly I will keep you posted!

Speaking of play, Asha and Holt are planning on going to the next party at Goodhandy’s and were hopeful that Jack and I might join them.  The idea of a foursome is becoming more and more appealing the more I think about it.  I still have to get it figured out with Nia if she can watch the kiddos for us that night, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it all works out.  Even if we don’t all hit it off as a foursome, it would be really hot to play with Jack or with them at the party.

Parties bring us ’round to the next topic of excitement, Padme’s visit!! Only 30 days to go before she arrives for her trip out here.  She and I discussed it on the phone today, going over the itinerary of her time here.  We plan to go for sushi on Thursday night, and then a walk, and then a long coffee date at Starbucks.  Friday morning we are hitting the gym together and then grocery shopping for the fondue on Friday night.  The afternoon will be spent drinking coffee and cutting all of the veggies and meat into bite-sized pieces.  Once the kids go to bed the three of us are going to chat over a pot of hot oil while drinking strawberry margaritas.

Saturday morning we’ll be off to Toronto bright and early for a day of shopping at Eaton’s Center and along Queen St.  I’m going to take her Banufor vodka shots, Zaban, and chicken kabobs and then to Dufflet for pastry.  We’re going to shop at Misbehavin and Come As You Are.  Saturday night will be spent getting naughty at Goodhandy’s I Love Sex Party and who knows what other mischief we’ll get into.

Sunday we’re going to Niagara Falls, and on a wine tour of the Niagara wine region.  We’ll be hauled about in a passenger van, tasting wines and cheese at several wineries.  The tour also includes a full ‘behind the scenes’ look at the Jackson Triggs Estates winery.  I know both Padme and myself are looking forward to that part a great deal!  We’ll likely go for supper at Niagara On The Lake, and then make our way home for a relaxing bath in my ensuite tub, while sipping ice wine and reliving the highlights of the weekend.

Monday we will likely go to the gym in the morning, and then a driving tour of the area where I live.  We’re going to take it easy so that I don’t send her home totally worn out

We’ve been counting down for weeks it seems!  I’m so excited that there is only a month left to go.  It’s starting to feel a lot closer now.

Hopefully the next four weeks pass quickly!

Before I get into the details, these nice people need some names.  Hmmmm, I think I shall call them Asha and Holt.

So the night before last I got up the cojones to call Asha and talk to her about the possibility of playing in the near future.  It rang, and rang, and my heart was pounding with anxiety, but the good kind.  Her voicemail picked up so I left her a message letting her know it was me and that I hadn’t wanted to wait too long before getting in touch with her.

Some time later my phone announced that a text message had arrived, it was Asha.  We started texting back and forth, exchanging snippets of useful information about each other.

First off, she is only 21, and had assumed I was her age, while I had assumed she was my age.  We had a bit of a giggle over that.  I mean really, 4 years isn’t much of a difference, although I am always a bit wary of young people who are swingers/poly because they tend to not know a heck of a lot about themselves.  However, we all know that age is not a good indication of self-awareness, intelligence, or emotional health.

Holt is 40, although I had guessed he was closer to early or mid 30′s.  They are not married, merely dating, and she has been swinging with him as a couple for about a year.

They don’t live together, but they do play outside of clubs/parties.  They are also into some light BDSM play and seem quite open to just about anything.

It was she who suggested that Jack and I do dinner and possibly more with the two of them at the earliest mutually agreeable juncture.  This is a very exciting opportunity, as I think it would be a lot of fun for Jack and I to play together.  I’m quite confident that Jack will find her attractive, and he’s so charming and sweet, I have no doubt that she will be interested in him as well.

We haven’t set anything in stone at this point, as far as a specific date for getting together.  Holt apparently has a precarious work schedule, and so I told her to discuss his availability with him and get back to me.  She and I are both eager to play some more so I am hopeful that I won’t have to wait too terribly long.  You all know how patient I am

Tonight is dinner at Susur.  Come hell or high water we are not rescheduling again.  We don’t have much planned for the weekend at this point, so this will be a lovely little night out for Jack and I.

Speaking of the weekend, Nia invited me to a Beltaine celebration this Sunday, so I’m hoping that I can attend with her.  I’ve never been to anything like that before, although Nia tells me that it can involve sex outside somewhere, if you’re into that sort of thing.  That reminded me of this song, which Nia and I agree should become the official theme song of Beltaine:

And speaking of songs/music, I’m starting drum lessons sometime this month.  Since drumming is on my list, and I found someone willing to teach me, I might as well get started on that.  My brothers are both musicians (neither of them drummers however) so I’m really looking forward to being able to jam with them sometime.

There is also a hand drumming workshop later this month that Nia and I signed up for.  I am really looking forward to that as well, and it feels really good to be picking up some new talents again.  I like to be constantly learning new things, new skills, etc and lately I’ve felt a bit stagnant in that department, so all of this drumming is just what I need!

I’m off to the gym this morning.  Happy May Day!!!

I apologise as well for the password protected entry that I posted some days ago.  I really do not intend to make a habit of such things, because I really enjoy being able to share parts of my life with all of you.  That said, there were times over the past 2.5 years when I was unable to blog about particular people or topics due to the sensitive nature of the circumstances or individuals.  This was distressing to me, because at the end of the day, blogging is something I do for myself, to work through thoughts or feelings, or even to keep an accurate recounting of events.  Jack and I often refer back on the blog where there is discussion about a certain time or place and we can’t remember what or when, we’ve even used it to figure out who was driving the vehicle when one of those pesky photo radar speeding tickets arrived in the mail.  Perhaps this doesn’t mean much to anyone who doesn’t blog, but for me being unable to retell certain feelings or events due to people in my life who would read it means that there were a lot of really important words I never managed to type out. 

Yes, I could have kept them as separate word documents or even written them in my paper journal, but for some reason that just never materialized.  Would it have under different circumstances?  Had I been able to blog about it more openly would I have gotten around to really doing so?  Maybe, maybe not.  The point is that the option wasn’t always there, and now that I have moved (to WordPress publishing tools with paid hosting) I have a way to write what is on my mind and sometimes keep it to myself.  I don’t do this to exclude everyone, and if you feel strongly enough about reading it you’re welcome to e-mail me about getting a password.  I promise I won’t do it often, since that’s not what this site is about, but I can’t promise I’ll never take advantage of that particular option.

On to more interesting tales now that I’ve cleared that up

Last night Nia and I went to another Sex Party at Goodhandy’s.  We met up with her playmate, who clearly needs a name I’m thinking, before we went to the bar, since things never really get going until after 10pm.  Before I continue lets come up with something to call said female friend…hmmm…Flavia.  Makes me think of flavour, which I’m sure she has since Nia spends so much time between her legs.  Hee Hee

So Nia and Flavia and myself arrived at Goodhandy’s and were immediately greeted by Todd, who remarked that now the party could really get started (since the party girls had arrived!  Woot!).  We got drinks and he encouraged us to go and watch the two very attractive young male models/porn stars who were masturbating on either side of the stage.  Being quite keen to encourage them we did just that.  An ex-boyfriend of Nia’s from years and years ago also decided to join us on our night out, although I’m not going to bother giving him a name at this point, so we’ll just call him Nia’s ex.  The four of us sat and chatted, and enjoyed our drinks, us girls frequently gazing at the naked eye candy on stage.  While we were sitting there the lovely couple whom I played with at the last party came in to the club.  They saw me right away and came over to give me hugs and say hello.  She was wearing this very hot corset and I remarked on how fabulous she looked.  I was hopeful that they would be inclined to play again later in the evening but I didn’t want to be pushy.  We agreed to run into each other again later, and off they went.

Meanwhile Flavia and Nia and the ex-boyfriend decided to kick off the spontaneous orgy, or at least a very hot and public threesome for the enjoyment of the crowd.  Some of the males who were watching got a little close, and had to be asked to back off a bit, but nobody had to be thrown out.  Todd is particularly protective of anyone who chooses to play and asked me to let him know immediately if anyone was being bothersome to our group.  In fact throughout the night the bouncers approached me several times to ensure that none of us were being harassed.  It really adds to the atmosphere when you know that you can be comfortable and that the staff there take their jobs very seriously when it comes to ensuring that everyone is well behaved.

One of the male models, who had since put on at least some of his clothes, approached me and introduced himself.  He was really, really attractive, and I was very tempted to accept his invitation to get naked with him.  As much as I wanted to say yes, especially when he asked so charmingly in that yummy accent of his, I politely declined.  Don’t ask me why, I just wasn’t in the right state of mind I suppose, and having intercourse with strange men is not generally a service I provide, no matter how gorgeous they are.

He wasn’t the only one I turned down.  Another of the regular models/porn stars, who was clearly drunk, approached me as well, introducing himself and asking if I wanted to play with him.  I let him kiss me a little before I said no.  Even though he was adorable I don’t like to fuck drunk boys, especially as I said above, drunk boys I don’t know.

The male half of the couple I mentioned early happened to be standing next to me at the bar sometime later in the evening, and leaned over to ask me a question.  The conversation went like this:

Him: So my girlfriend wants to know if we’re going to have Round 2 tonight?

Me: I don’t really know that it’s up to me actually (meaning it was up to them) but I am pretty sure I wouldn’t say no.

Him: Alright, I’ll tell her that

Then I smiled and returned to my friends, expecting to see them sometime shortly thereafter.

Unfortunately I didn’t, although they caught up to me as they were leaving, and after giving me hugs she remarked that she hoped I could play next time.  Confused I said that I could have played, but had assumed they didn’t want to.  He seemed surprised and asked me to clarify what I had said at the bar.  When I told him that I’d meant to imply it was up to them, there were groans of disappointment all around.  We had a bit of a laugh about it, although clearly we were all quite sad that the miscommunication had prevented a good time for all.

“We’ve been talking about you for the past 29 days!” he remarked, smiling but obviously a tad frustrated over the entire situation.  I reassured them, her in particular, that I had certainly not intended to reject that and that certainly I had been eager to play.  Turns out neither of us wanted to be pushy about anything, and in the process, had missed out.

She gave me her number and I promised that I would make my very best effort to attend the next party that they are able to come to as well (which unfortunately isn’t until the end of June, due to other life commitments they have).  We wished each other a good night and they left, followed shortly by the four of us.  Nia was staying in Toronto with Flavia, and I assumed her ex was as well, so I bid them farewell and drove home to my husband, falling into bed exhausted sometime around 4am.

The entire way home I stewed with annoyance over the missed opportunity, and debated in my head the proper thing to do at this juncture.  She gave me her cell number, which I didn’t ask for, she offered.  I really want to call her in a day or two and apologise again for the miscommunication, and assure her that I wasn’t rejecting them.  Then I kind of want to ask if they ever play away from Goodhandy’s?  Like could we all meet up for coffee or something and maybe get to know each other better?

Advice please!  I have no idea what the best course of action is in this situation.  I really, really want to see them again, since I find both of them very attractive (now that I had a chance to get a good look at him).  To any couples out there who are swingers or poly, what would you like a girl you are clearly interested in to do if she and you were in this situation?  The future of my interaction with them, and thus the potential for more hot stories about our fun, depends on you.

Today was a day for relaxation and recovery.  Jack took the kids and I into Mississauga to go to the new Earl’s restaurant that just opened there.  Earl’s was one of our all time favorite places back in Alberta, so we were very excited to hear that one was being opened in Square One Mall this month.

Before we had dinner Jack indulged me with a shopping spree at Lush.  I picked up a couple of small chunks of Ice Blue and Sea Vegetable soaps, which I have heard are good for dreads, so that I could try them both and see which one I like better.  After some more browsing I decided to pick up a couple of their massage bars, which I haven’t had the opportunity to try yet.  When you buy two of them you get a free tin to keep them in, so I went with Wiccy Magic Muscles (for all those sore spots after hitting the gym) and Fever, for those sensual massages I sometimes give to Jack before bed.  Yum!  The girls who worked there recommended I try the Mask Of Magnamintywhen I enquired about trying something new for my skin.  I wouldn’t say that I am prone to breakouts all the time, but I certainly notice them more before my period, so this is apparently just the treatment to have on hand for those times.  No visit to Lush is complete without picking up some bath bombs for the mammoth tub we have.  This time I picked up a Sex Bomb(so good, one of my favs) a couple of Waving Not Drowning and an All That Jaz.  I had to pry myself out of there before I really got out of hand, but I was very pleased when I left with my bag of goodies.

Dinner was really yummy, and afterwards we took the young ones for ice cream.  It was actually a really nice way to end the weekend.  I think I’m going to have a nice hot shower before crawling into bed tonight, since I’ve spent to much time writing about the weekend, and eaten up all the time I had intended to use for having a bath.

This week I am hitting the gym every day, and Thursday night is Susur.  I’m planning to call that nice couple once you guys give me some feedback on how to handle that conversation   Or even if you don’t, LOL, since I don’t want to miss out again.  Should be a fairly quiet week overall, and I’ll keep you posted on developments for next weekend!

“There is a line of people waiting to spank you, you know” Nia commented to me while I gasped and writhed under the delicious torture a new friend was inflicting on my rear. “I hope you’re ok with that.”

Indeed I was. I’m certain at least 3 or 4 people touched my butt at some point while I was on the bench. All of them certainly polite, asking permission before just going ahead, not that I would have objected to anything at that point.

A gorgeous, tall trans woman was being quite a flirt, and I was at least coherent enough to invite her to the party next weekend (April 6th). I quite liked her and I’m hopeful she’ll show, if only so I can make up for the kissing I think I missed out on (I was too blissed out to put the moves on her properly).

It was only polite to give Nia a turn on the bench, and while she enjoyed herself I mingled a little more, admiring some of the other patrons. Mandy Goodhandy (the club owner) lured me out on the dance floor for a couple of songs, which made my little fangirl heart nearly burst with excitement.

Eventually I found myself spectating on a threesome that Nia was tangled up in with another young woman and the generous man who had spanked my ass earlier. The guy in question was getting quite the blow job from the pretty gal in the middle, while Nia squatted at my feet, nearly her entire hand inside of said gals pussy. I enjoyed spectating, and it’s not every day someone gushes several cups worth of liquid only inches from your feet. Thank goodness there were towels nearby.

Apparently an attractive couple nearby felt that I needed a little attention of my own, or as Nia pointed out after, were waiting to see if I was going to join in on the threesome happening only inches from me. When I didn’t, I figure they felt it was safe to ask me to play. The woman approached me first, sitting down to introduce herself and then asking if she could make out with me. Naturally I obliged, LOL, figuring that her male partner was into watching her with women. After only a minute or two of kissing, she asked if she could go down on me.

How fortunate for her that letting people eat my pussy is a service I provide!

Actually, I was hesitant, but she was so sweet, she found her way between my thighs in seconds. To be totally honest with all of you, I’ve never had a woman go down on me before. Certainly I’ve licked a pussy or two, but never been on the receiving end, and all of you know about my aversion to oral sex.

Did I mention we were on stage? In front of at least 20 or so people (if not more, I was hardly counting). She had me lay back on the edge of the stage, legs spread, skirt lifted to allow her access to what she was after. Her fingers and lips and tongue and mouth were doing all of the right things…it was incredible.

While she was turning me into a puddle of goo, I felt her husband sit down to my left. She asked if it was ok for him to take a turn, and I could only groan and nod. He switched her spots, and when she came up to kiss me, I tasted myself all over her lips. Hot!

He was certainly no slouch at cunnilingus, and she turned her attention to my breasts and nipples. I could have cared less who was watching at that point. He was sitting in front of the stage, my stiletto-clad feet slung over his shoulders while he went to work on my pussy like he’d been waiting to lick it for decades.

Enthusiastic is an understatement.

He’d wrapped his arms around my thighs, holding me down to the stage (with some struggle, due to the way I was thrashing about). His mouth was locked over my clit like he might never let go. I could feel myself building, and my moans escalated in volume, which only made him double his efforts. My body was beginning to tremble, and I could feel her biting my nipples. Over the edge I went, screaming the entire way, just to make sure absolutely everyone on the block knew I was cumming.

I had to push him away, since I become so intensely sensitive after I orgasm. The two of them seemed quite pleased, and when I thanked him profusely he replied “No no, thank YOU!” like I had just given him the greatest gift on earth. I didn’t have time to say much else before they wandered off, perhaps to enjoy each other somewhere more private.

I was unsteady on my feet, particularly in those hot-as-hell but totally impractical shoes, and I was cursing the fact that I had not worn any panties, as my juices were running down the insides of my legs. Figuring that really, the night was coming to a close and wandering back to the car with wet thighs was really not so bad, we gathered ourselves and bid goodnight to our new friends.

The drive home was mostly quiet, both Nia and I grinning like idiots, but too tired to really talk much. We drug ourselves off to bed, as she was staying the night at my place, setting the alarm for only hours later (3.5 hours to be exact).

Today we are exceptionally giggly, retelling last nights best moments over and over. I’ll likely need a nap later, but let me tell you, the exhaustion is more than worth it.

Really, it was only a appetizer for what is to come at next Sunday’s party. I can hardly wait at this point. K arrives on Friday, and I’m so looking forward to seeing him. F will fly in on Saturday morning, and I’m hoping that Jack won’t hoard her all to himself, although I’m pretty certain that he will, LOL. I know we’re going to have a fabulous time, and I even managed to secure a sitter for 5 hours on Sunday, so that Jack can join us at the party for at least part of the festivities.

I’m sure that I will have much to blog about over the next couple of weeks. The trick of it is finding the time to sit down and write it all

You know it’s my first one don’t you?

I’m a little nervous, but hell, it’s a great excuse to break in those thigh high boots, and you know I’ll use any excuse I can find to lace myself into those bad boys.

Plus it’ll be a great warm up for the other big party next weekend!

Nia and I aren’t dating by the way, nor sleeping with each other, just to be clear. We’re going together as pals, since I’m way too chicken to go by myself, and since it’s a party, taking friends is good!

Hopefully I’ll be up to blogging about it on Sunday I’m sure there will be interesting stories to share!

No time to chat just now though. Just wanted to share the excitement and let you know I’m still around. Even though I haven’t been updating regularly I hope everyone still checks out the micro blogging there in the sidebar, which I try to update daily.

For the most part I make a very conscious effort to avoid expectations. I realize that sometimes it happens without a lot of thought, but really, I do my best not to have them.

Last night I somehow slipped, formed an expectation in the back of my mind, and as a result was thoroughly and completely disappointed.

I don’t feel like getting into details, but lets just say a last minute get together did not go at all like I had wanted it to. This wouldn’t have been so terrible had the result not been a bit of a blow to my ego.

Other than that, the weekend was brilliant. I got to have coffee with my friend Rob, who wrote that excellent book I reviewed some months ago. We swapped stories over lattes in Starbucks, discussing writing and relationships and the party I’ve mentioned here (which he will be attending, along with his lovely girlfriend).

We eventually had to bid each other a good day, since I had other commitments. It was a lovely way to start off Sunday at any rate.

Off to Miri’s house for diner lunch and coffee, followed by relationship discussion and much venting about males and how inconvenient they often are. We snuggled some, since she was nursing a hangover and I was nursing my slighted pride. It was good to have a girls bitch session and some fairly innocent cuddling

Around supper time I figured I’d better head home. I hadn’t slept well at all (I rarely do in unfamiliar places) and it was a long haul back to our house. Reluctantly I wished her a good evening and off I went. Thank god for Tim Horton’s and satellite radio.

Self-inflicted disappointments aside, it was a pretty alright weekend. My period is starting today, and I didn’t have ANY PMS, thanks to my regular working out and drinking lots of water. I’m going to keep on my gym schedule this week, and I have a waxing appointment on Saturday, which is always more painful around this time, but I can take it.

Blogging may be light for the next week or so. I bought paint for our house interior over the weekend, which means I will be spending a lot of my time scantily clad with a roller in my hand. I like to paint in my underwear. Perhaps I will grace you with photos.

February is almost over, which hopefully means spring is upon us. I’ve had enough of the snow. On to the nice weather!

Monday was a holiday here in Ontario; their first ever Family Day long weekend. Family Day is luxury I’d been accustomed to in Alberta for as long as I can remember. We went out for breakfast as a family, lounged about in the afternoon, and then went out for supper as well. It completely threw off my regular schedule however, and so today only feels like Tuesday, which means I feel behind in my week already. Not that I am complaining about the extra day with Jack

Nia and I have been hitting the gym four times a week now, which seems to eat up at least a couple of hours on those days. It feels so good to be working out again. I needed to get out of the house this evening, so I treated myself to a new yoga mat and some sexy workout gear. One can never have too many good sports bras or lycra booty shorts.

This weekend I have a couple of dates lined up. Sunday I am having coffee with a friend who I’ve mentioned here before, but who has not been assigned a name as of yet. I did photos for her one Saturday afternoon not long ago, and we’ve hit it off quite excellently. I shall call her Miri, which means ‘mine’ and you can read into that however you will *sly wink*.

Afterwards, I am getting together with Nelek, for coffee and more lascivious things. Due to circumstances beyond my control, I likely won’t be able to spend any time with him again until well into March. Thus, I am going to make the most of Sunday, as they say.

Today was spent indoors, tidying the house while I listened to episodes of Polyamory Weekly on my iPod Touch (a generous Christmas gift from that fabulous husband of mine). Nothing like being elbow-deep in dishwater while Minx purrs on about responsible non-monogamy. She may yet inspire me to try doing a podcast of my own.

Before I leave off for the evening and crawl into bed with Jack, I have a favour to ask! I need some dare suggestions for an adult party. I know I’ve asked for this before, but this time I need them to be short and easily applied to a group of people who don’t know each other well. We’re going to be writing them on slips of paper and giving one to each guest at random. We’ve got things like “Show some skin” and “Introduce yourself to an attractive stranger” but I need quite a few more. So, think about going to a sexy adult party where you might not know anyone all that well. What sorts of dares would you like to see people do? What would you be willing to do? Leave me some comments please

Friday night was supposed to be my date with the guy, who I’ve just now realised needs a name…

Hmmmmmmm, I am thinking Loki, since it’s a name I’ve always quite liked, and the man in question is a bit of a trickster (he teases me all the time about taking him too seriously).

Anyway, Loki got home Friday night and was feeling decidedly unwell. He said he was going to take something for his stomach and lay down for a bit, in the hopes that he’d get over it. Unfortunately, he was tired from work and totally passed out, not waking up until nearly midnight (I was already in bed with Jack by that time). He felt just awful about it the next day, but I told him not to stress, it happens.

Besides, I was already well into Saturday, which was absolutely fantastic. Nia and I had a wonderful time with our new friend. The second girl was ill that day and had to cancel (must be something going around). We spent the day snapping photos, snacking, and generally hanging out. I got some lovely pictures for the calendar, and the three of us totally hit it off. By the end of the day we ALL had our photos taken, in various states of undress. I even got to flex my Dominant side a bit, with some light play on each of them. Being generous gals they didn’t leave me out, and I spent at least half an hour bent over the arm of a couch with my skirt hiked up around my waist. Mmmmmmm, great times.

It was creeping into the hours of Sunday morning when I crawled into bed with a sore bum and a satisfied smirk.

Sunday was another fun-filled adventure. I took my friend into Toronto’s downtown and we spent hours shopping and laughing. Often she makes me laugh so hard I nearly pass out from lack of oxygen, it’s brilliant.

I didn’t buy anything exciting, just some household goods, but we had a lovely time. She hadn’t been into downtown much, and thought I was amazing for being able to do so without becoming nervous (even after we missed our exit on the 401 and had to backtrack without a map). I drove her through China Town and Portugal Village, and promised we would go to the Banu for vodka in the near future. I would like to try their Zaban (braised cow tongue) and maybe even the lamb testicles if I’m feeling particularly adventurous.

The weekend was lovely, and Loki has tentatively rescheduled our date for this Friday night. Jack, the kids, and I are going on a bit of a road trip Saturday, to spend the night up in cottage country. It will be nice to get away overnight with them. The only downer is that my period is due today which means I’ll likely not feel totally on the ball, LOL.

I can hardly believe that February is already upon us. January passed by so quickly, I could hardly catch my breath. Not that I am complaining, since I can hardly wait for spring to arrive, I’ve had my fill of winter.

*Orson Scott Card

First, over the weekend, I began talking to someone new, whom I met online at one of those questionable chat sites. Certainly it might seem like a skeezy way to connect with someone, improbable that they are really interested in more than fucking me.

I figured though, that since I am on there, and not a sleaze bag, some of the other users must not be sleaze bags either. Why not at least give the guy a chance?

He’s 30 years old, and lives in a city about 45 minutes away from where I live. He has an old motorcycle that he rebuilt himself, and an impressive career that required significant post-secondary education. He’s a born and raised Ontarian, never been married, and has no children (that he has mentioned). He seems to be quite keen on the concept of poly, although he has no experience with such things. With a bit of a dominant streak, he doesn’t come across as particularly needy, which is very attractive.

Earlier this week he asked me out on a real date. Not a “lets do drinks and then hopefully you’ll get naked with me” date, but a “can I take you out to a movie and get to know you” kind of date. This Friday night he’s taking me to see Cloverfield. I’m quite excited, although cautiously optimistic. Thus far it seems he would be a suitable boyfriend, but I realize it’s way too early to tell. I promise to spare no details however, although you might not get them until Monday, because on Saturday I have more plans!

Nia and I are off to spend the day with some other gals and I’m going to be taking some photos for a calendar. Yes, my first real photography ‘job’ which will be a fantastic opportunity to expand my portfolio of work. Also I get to spend the day in the company of gorgeous ladies, so it’s pretty much win-win all around. I’m looking forward to it to no end, since I can always use more friends and all the better if they are sexy women in corsets!

Sunday I am taking a day trip downtown to Eaton’s Center and area with another mum I recently befriended here. She’s quite a bit older than me and is not privy to my secret life, but she makes me laugh so hard I can’t breath, which I like. She’s not inclined to drive downtown by herself, so I suggested that her and I have a shopping day together, leaving the young ones at home with our respective husbands. There are some tea shops down there that I wish to visit, although Jack might have a breakdown if I bring home even one more packet of tea leaves (I think I have somewhere around 25 kinds these days).

I should be good and exhausted by Sunday night, since I doubt I will get much sleep all weekend.

Aside from all those thrilling weekend plans, I’ve had a great week here at home. The house is tidy and becoming more organized every day. Jack and I are recovering from the gorge-mania that was Christmas and getting back on the horse so to speak with healthy eating. Nia has suggested that her and I sign up for fitness classes of some sort, which I think I will discuss with her more this weekend. I’d love to look into kickboxing or perhaps even something a little more racy, like pole dancing lessons/strippersize.

I’m feeling a lot better about myself, and about the state of life in general. I also feel very content with our decision NOT to move back to Alberta any time in the foreseeable future. Things seem to be coming around here, falling in to place slowly but surely. Nia suggested earlier this week that Jack and I indulge in a few more date nights while she wrangles the young ones, so that we don’t feel so lonely and overwhelmed at times. What a sweet and generous suggestion on her part don’t you think? I intend to take her up on that, perhaps very soon since I have a craving for good Indian food and I know a little place not far from here that serves up a wicked curry.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to finalize my brunch menu for Saturday (since I love to feed people I’ve informed our hostess that I will happily provide the morning meal) and make a grocery list. Come Monday I should have a good number of stories to share.

Happy Hump Day! Jack and I celebrated with a quick, half-conscious, morning romp before he headed to work, tee hee.

Today has been a little of both. Certainly I have things to blog about, but the want to has eluded me. Perhaps I can coax out my muse with a little wine.

Another contributing factor, although to a lesser extent, might be the fact that Nia reads this blog. I felt that keeping it from her was wrong, although I am not sure why. I’ve gone over this at least a half a dozen times with all of you, and yet it presents a dilemma to me every time. In this case, I decided to be open about it.

Which presents me another dilemma, can I really write honestly and openly about someone when I know they are going to read it? Would any of us have gushed about that boy in math class on the pages of our grade 7 journal had we known he was going to read it the next day?

I certainly wouldn’t have.

Luckily this isn’t grade 7 and I’m not nearly as careful about what I say or do in front of others. Still, when a ‘relationship’ or whatever we are doing might be called, is very new, laying all of your cards on the table could be a bad idea.

That said, I don’t see the point of blogging when I only reveal half-truths or nothing at all. Why be bothered? I’ve promised myself time and again that when I felt like I should blog about something, dammit I’m going to blog about it.

Nia’s visit here on Sunday was really wonderful. Even though neither of us is 100% healthy yet, we enjoyed snacking and writing our Christmas cards together. The kids absolutely adored her, and have already asked me several times when she can come back to visit again.

Jack was mostly engrossed in watching The Grey Cup, so she and I visited amongst ourselves and grumbled about what a pain in the ass Christmas cards are.

I certainly enjoyed her company, and I was very relieved that things were not the least bit awkward after the disagreement we had last week.

What disagreement you ask?

I’m not inclined to share details, but to put it simply Nia and I disagree on a specific issue that each of us feels rather strongly about. The discussion was not particularly heated, nor did it get mean or nasty, but I know it disturbed us both greatly.

What exactly this means is still unclear. She doesn’t know if she wants to date someone with my particular opinion, and while I certainly understand and respect that, I can’t help but be a tad discouraged.

It’s so very, very rare that I am attracted to women. Thus far it’s only happened a handful of times, which is probably why I’ve never dated a woman before. Generally the feelings either are not mutual, or there are other circumstances that prevent a real connection (such as distance). I’ve been sexually intimate with a couple of women, but that was not in the context of a dating relationship.

Basically, I have absolutely no idea what I am doing when it comes to pursuing women.

I dislike being all awkward and unsure of myself and part of me just wants to come out and ask Nia what exactly it is we are doing. Are we dating? Are we just friends? Is there any chance that this will be more? AM I BEING PSYCHOTIC?!?!??!

I feel dumb and out of my element. I’m not into labels, but at the same time I don’t want to run into the issue of mismatched expectations and ideas. I’ve done that dance too many times and it almost always ends badly for one or both of the people involved. I also don’t want to be investing the wrong kinds of emotions into our friendship only to end up being way off base.

Maybe I just need to stop being a freak, and allow it to be what it is.

This whole thing wouldn’t be nearly as difficult if I didn’t like her as much as I do. Yes, it’s early still and I know that I’m making way too big of a deal out if it all, but I haven’t really hit it off with anyone like this in a long time and I really don’t want to muck it up right off the start.

Anyway, there you have it, the happenings of the weekend and emotional angst all rolled in together. Go me!

The last time I mentioned introducing someone I was dating to my kids, my comment board erupted with horror and disgust. Seriously, if you don’t remember that, go and check it out, it was crazy!

You’d think I had suggested roasting my own young ones on a spit, and then eating them with hollandaise sauce.

Seeing as I haven’t had a negative comment here in months, I doubt that will happen again, although it would be very entertaining.

We were discussing Christmas Cards, and she offered to come over to drink tea and write our respective cards together. Since Jack and the kids plan to hunker down with snacks and beer helmets and foam fingers to watch The Grey Cup on Sunday, we decided that would be the perfect opportunity for tea and strumpets…err..crumpets.

I’m all excited about having her over, although I need to get some tidying done before Jack will permit me to bring anyone into the house. He’s a bit…uh… *insert word that rhymes with ‘tit-hickey’* about how The Lair looks when we have company.

Plus it gives me a perfect excuse to do a little Christmas baking, which I generally try to avoid for the sake of my waist line. Does anyone have any favorite holiday recipes they care to share with me? I was thinking butter tart squares (like butter tarts for lazy people) and maybe some chocolate orgasm cookies…or cinnamon buns, Yum! I have recipes for those things, but if you have others to add, share away!

I’m still feeling a bit under the weather, but nothing serious. I seem to be getting better, rather than worse, which is a relief. The kids and Jack seem to have avoided contracting whatever unpleasant thing I’ve been suffering from.

Hopefully I will have a review to post tomorrow, and I am sure the weekend will present a lot of interesting and fun events about which I can blog.

For now, I bid you a good evening, for I am off to write my shopping list and perhaps take a nice long bath with a cup of hot tea and a book.

Last night I picked up Nia in the evening to go for supper. We had curry at this really great little pub nearby. The food was awesome, much to our mutual delight! I am especially in love with their naan bread, which I wouldn’t exactly describe as authentic (gauging it in comparison to naan I’ve had at other Indian restaurants) but it’s so freakin good, it doesn’t matter.

There was this chick pea dish, with a coconut curry sauce. OMG! Delicious.

After supper, we decided to wander around a bit, checking out all of the beautiful new Christmas displays set up in the shop windows. While we were admiring the paintings in the window of an art gallery we were approached by two young men from The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints.

“I’m an Atheist” I said firmly, when one of them asked if we were interested in hearing a message about Jesus. Oddly that seemed to put him off enough that he turned his attention to Nia who informed him curtly that she is in fact Pagan (he didn’t understand what that was, so she said “I’m a witch” and the look on his face was priceless). They did not persist, which was surprising, but a relief at any rate.

I saw a few gifts that would be perfect for some of my friends, not to mention great decorating ideas! Nia took me into one of the only shops still open at that hour to look at all of the really unique, and funky things inside. It was like a really chic little variety store. They had the most hilarious hand made greeting cards, a small assortment of clothing and hats, gorgeous bathroom accessories, some fun pet stuff, jewelry, and other little odds and ends. I have to go back there for sure!

Once we had strolled enough, we went back to her place, got naked, and…

Kidding

I’m terrible.

We hung out with some of her friends in the common room of her apartment complex, swapped stories and laughed and laughed. It was great fun! She taught me how to play cribbage, and I actually did not too bad.

It was getting late, but I wanted to show her some sex toys online before I left. She made me a cup of tea in her place while I snorgled the kitties.

Neither of us realized that it was almost 2am until Jack called me to make sure I was alright and hadn’t been in an accident or anything. We decided we’d better call it a night, since she was already feeling under the weather, and I had to be up early this morning. We bid each other goodnight and I headed for home, tired but really, really happy!

This afternoon we chatted online and decided to get together tomorrow afternoon for movies and knitting! We are Teh Kool Kids, LOL.

Whether or not we are actually ‘dating’ is still undecided, although we discussed it and nearly died laughing over our mutual awkwardness. I don’t think it matters at any rate, I really enjoy spending time with her, so who needs ‘labels’.

I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Recently I had started chatting to someone new online. We found that we both had a LOT of things in common. Really odd things at that, which I generally do not find I have in common with other people. After only a couple of chats and a couple of e-mails, it was clear that there was a connection, and we decided to meet as soon as possible. Saturday afternoon was the first mutually agreeable opportunity to do so, and thus we made a plan to meet and then go out to this fetish event for a few hours. I was very, very excited. Also, more nervous than I have been in a long, long time, because this new person is a woman.

Why is that so remarkable? Well, for one thing I’ve never dated a woman before. For another because that seems to be a distinct possibility in this particular situation. I can already tell that she and I will be friends, so I am giving her a name for use on this blog. I searched a bit to come up with something that I felt did her justice, and settled on Nia (a shortened version of Niamh, who is the Celtic Goddess of beauty and brightness).

So, at the appointed hour on Saturday, I drove to her house to meet her. My first impression was “OMG, she’s so adorable” and I especially loved her hair, which is short and crazy and totally fun. She was also wearing this really cool skirt that I forgot to ask her about. I got to meet all of her fabulous pets (she lives alone, besides her 8 super cute furballs) and discuss her future renovation plans for her place. Nia wasn’t feeling that well when I arrived, so she made us some coffee and we talked and petted her cats and bunnies.

Talking to her felt so natural, there were no awkward moments at all, and it felt like we had been friends for a long time. Conversation was light-hearted and playful, and we hit it off even better in person than we had online. I was thrilled.

After our coffee, she felt somewhat better, and so we decided to check out the event for at least a short while.

The event itself was sort of like a flea market, similar to the ones we had back in Calgary. Kinky craftsmen from near and far, as well as representatives for other events, gathered together to sell stuff and also hand out fliers and information on everything from kinky camp outs to BDSM bed & breakfasts.

She and I browsed the tables and collected business cards and admired all the beautiful items for sale. Most of it was very reasonably priced, and I indulged in a little retail therapy and picked up a simple, solid oak, rectangular paddle. Yum!

Nia had lost a few of her favorite toys during her last breakup, so she treated herself to a new set of leather cuffs (wrist and ankle) which the vendor gave her a good deal on. He even threw in a free massager thing with pokey little nubbins on it.

I also met a really cool gal who makes synthetic dreadlocks in lots of cool colors, which I’ve been wanting. Basically I can add them into my own dreads for added color, volume, and fun (not long-term, just for like a weekend or special night out or something). I snagged her business card and I intend to check out her website. I’d like to have something funky for NYE.

We browsed and chatted and browsed some more. I found out that she is a switch, and has been poly for 8 years (she’s 29 by the way). Her and her ex-boyfriend were hoping to meet a bi-female to form a triad with eventually but the relationship broke up of it’s own issues before that happened. They remain friends, they just discovered they can’t be in a relationship together.

After we finished up at the event, I drove her back to her place so that she could pick up some stuff to take to a friends house. I offered to drive her over there as well, since she doesn’t have a vehicle. We yapped the whole drive, picked up her stuff, drove to her friends house, dropped it off, yapped all the way back to her place, and then sat in the car talking for half an hour. We could have kept going for hours and hours I am sure. However, I had another date that night. She gave me a big hug before I left and we promised to make plans again as soon as possible.

I drove off feeling giddy as hell. Strange but exciting.

Next stop was my house, to pick up Mr. Hottie-Pants (more commonly known as Jack) and head off to a pub for a pint of beer and some nachos. We enjoyed getting out kid-free for a few hours, and just talking and being together as a couple. No rushing or craziness, it was very relaxing.

The sitter had no trouble with the kids (they adore her) and they had been asleep for a couple of hours by the time we got in. We crawled into bed and cuddled, and fell asleep almost immediately.

Today was a nice relaxing day. I made us a big breakfast, and then we went out for a drive and did some fun stuff with the kids. What a wonderful weekend.

This week I am going to another kink munch, and I’m hoping Nia will have some free time to spend with me sometime during the week or next weekend. Even if nothing romantic ever develops, I’m pleased to have such a cool new friend.